memeufacturing:

memeufacturing:

memeufacturing:

memeufacturing:

memeufacturing:

memeufacturing:

if teenagers are ever being mean to you just pull out any miscellaneous item you have on you at the moment and make up some bullshit term to scare them

teenagers: we are going to punch you
me *pulling out spoon*: have you lot ever been Uncle Jimmied

teenagers: we are going to kick you
me *pulling out an electric toothbrush*: have you all ever experienced a Norwegian Christmas…

teenagers: we are going to unlawfully take your money
me *taking car keys out of my pocket*: say, have any of you ever had a Pacific Ocean Garbage Patch…….

teenagers: we are going to call you mean names
me *taking Costco brand pair of socks out of my purse*: it’s been a while since i gave someone a Tropic Of Capricorn………….

teenagers: we’re violent just for the fun of it !
me *microwaving a hard-boiled egg*: you’re all about to get a Matthew Broderick Jr.